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Wednesday, August 7, 2013

The Secret To My Seductive Success


Ritual enriches me.

Ritual grounds me.

It brings me home to myself and is my best anti-depressant. 

It sends me to sleep on a bed of candlelit clouds.

It wakes me up in the morning feeling cozy and at home in my own skin. 

It reminds me that whoa, this whole life thing is pretty god damn precious and I should take notice more often.

It makes the games I played as a child of turning grape juice into magic potions 100% real.

Ritual is something I am really good at.

It is actually the secret of my seductive success.

I am a seductress because of my rituals.

They are woven into me like a thousand silken threads.

Today I was walking down the street with bags under my eyes, wearing jeans and an old t-shirt with a coffee stain on it, feeling fairly contemptuous about humanity and rocking frizzy hair.

I still got two cat calls.

It is because of the way magic of my rituals oozes out of my pores.

On Sunday, September 22nd, 15 lucky women will enter my secret cavern of seductive ritual.  It is a cave that is dark as night at the entrance, and opens into the most beautiful, rich, aromatic, colorful, plush cave you have ever seen.  It is an irresistible place to be, and a glorious place to live.

I invite you to enter this cave with me, and emerge anew, leaving a trail of seductive essence in your wake.

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