How I lost 30 pounds...(you asked, and it's not what you think)

Thank you all so much for your feedback and responses to my recent blog "I lost 30 pounds...Oh No"! It has been a big leap of faith to live my relationship with my body so transparently and I thank you for all your support. Many of you have asked me, “So...how’d ya do it?”.  Here's the story:

• I went to Costa Rica and became a certified Qoya teacher. I now teach Qoya every Tuesday. Qoya has completely revolutionized my relationship to my body and exercise. Because of that, I now look forward to exercising like I look forward to a massage.
• I read Kris Carr's Crazy, Sexy, Diet, really jived with her philosophy, and have started eating a ton more whole foods, raw veggies, and drinking green juice.
• I really upped the ante of love and passion in my life, my marriage, my friendships and my career. Like, REALLY upped the ante.
• I'm working with an amazing therapist, which has led to more truth telling, and less smiling while flipping the bird under the table.

The list goes on and on. My point is, none of the things on this list, nor the weight loss itself, would ever have transpired without one thing.

Prescription Drugs. :)

Not what you were expecting to hear? Me either. Here’s the story.

My whole life I have experienced moderate to severe depression  (I know, who hasn’t?).  The last few years it got more severe as it began to be served alongside a hearty serving of nighttime anxiety, which led to intense insomnia. Pretty much everyone knows what it feels like to be depressed, but this was depression resulting in an average of 4-6 hours of sleep every night for a good three years.  I would sometimes catch up on weekends, but most of the time I walked around in a state of bitchiness at best, what-the-fuck-is-the-point of-even-living at worst. It was like I had forgotten how to sleep.

Sleep is an essential bodily function, like being able to pee.  Imagine if you just somehow forgot how to pee. The thing about sleep though, is you can survive without it, unlike being unable to pee.  So for a good two to three years I would chase my tail each day and night, lying awake, praying for sleep.  I’d wake up a few hours later in an absolute panic that I hadn’t slept, terrified that I wouldn’t be able to sleep again that night, and the cycle would repeat. This fear would paralyze me throughout the day, and the lack of sleep made me an absolute grouch, anti-social, and opened the door for severe depression.

I tried everything I could think of. Therapy. A new king size bed.  Quitting my corporate job that stressed me out so much.  Rescue Remedy.  Gemstones under the pillow.  All of these things would help temporarily, but each time it was like getting a taste of my tail only to have it slip through my teeth once more, when I’d find myself wide eyed and awake at 2am yet again.  

Now, you might be thinking, “girl, go to the doctor!” I wasn’t raised by hippies, but I do seem to have this gene that leads me to believe I should be able to fix everything with my mind and behaviors (or at least by taking some herbs).  If I just started eating right, exercising each morning, taking the right supplements, meditating, doing the things I really wanted to be doing with my time,  took a watercolors class, did a cleanse at an Arizona spa...I’d be able to work it all out.

Thank God for my husband.  Imagine this poor guy having to deal with a cracked-out insomniac, clinging to her gemstones and chamomile tea as he gently nudged me for two solid years in the direction of getting medical help.  

Sleep aids? I think not.

Antidepressants? Oh no, I am not letting the pharmaceutical companies catch me like a fly in their spider web.

Seeing a psychiatrist to examine my family’s history of depression and mental illness? And then take some magic pill to make it all go away? No thank you.

Wait a minute.  What if there was a magic pill that could make this all go away? Not exactly make it all go away, but at least get me sleeping again. If I could sleep maybe I would have the energy to do something other than barely survive.   And what if there is something going on in my body where I was not getting enough serotonin or whatever.  I mean, even my therapist told me it is not normal to wake up every morning with a feeling of absolute dread.

So finally, I surrendered to the experiment.  I moved the gemstones to a pretty bowl on my nightstand and I went to see a psychiatrist.  After a two hour evaluation, his response was basically, “How has it taken you this long to come see a psychiatrist?” He gave me some Prozac and Klonopin and told me to come back in a month. I figured, let’s give this a go for a year or so, and see what happens.  It can’t get any worse.

That was about six months ago.  I’m happy to say, the experiment is working. I sleep like a dream now. But not a drugged-out, “Can’t sleep without me pills!” sleep.  I am back in the pattern of going to bed, reading or watching Downton Abbey repeats, and just nodding off.  I wake up refreshed and ready.  This morning I have already practiced my Qoya routine for tonight’s class, made lunch for this afternoon, and a green juice for later.  I’ve dressed cute for the day, and I gave myself the luxury of 30 minutes of writing instead of 30 minutes of Facebook.  Because I am rested I now have the energy now to do all the things I described in the bullet points above which, yes, led to my eventual weight loss.

Now, let me make one thing VERY CLEAR.  This is not an ad for prescription drugs. I am not saying that everyone should go get some Prozac and in turn we’d create world peace.  It is simply a transparent account of my journey with my health.  And how interestingly, the thing we resist the strongest, even if that thing might be the easiest way out, is often the very thing that will create real, lasting change. Again, I’m not saying it takes the pharmaceutical industry to create lasting change.  I’m simply saying that this step, which I resisted for so long, is the one thing that has finally worked.    

There will come a day when I’m ready to stop taking these drugs, and I will probably resist that for way longer than I need to as well.  But this has been a powerful learning experience: the thing you think is the last thing you need is at least worth a try.  

I know this is a charged topic.  And I want to hear from you.  What has been your experience with making big life changes you resisted for a long time, and what finally worked? Leave me a comment below.

There are two more chapters coming on this topic. The next is how you can use the art of seduction to make those big life changes with ease and grace.  But that one my doves, you will have to wait for. Unless you want to jump right in with me in September's Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice.

I lost 30 pounds...Oh No!

I definitely used to "Mousercise" with Mickey
Mouse Clubhouse.  If only I could find that photo.

So.  Recently, I lost 30 pounds.

I remember sitting in front of the mirror at 17, pinching my belly, rounding my spine as much as possible to get my belly to look like Jabba the Hut, praying that I would be struck with enough self hatred to lead to an “ah ha!” moment. One that would make me say “enough is enough” and result in me losing 30 pounds like those lucky bitches I read about every month in Self magazine. When I was 17, and I saw my precious teenage body changing and growing beyond my control, I decided that 170 was the weight that I would start seriously considering suicide.  I got up to about 170 at age 18, and then dipped down to 150 after a summer of, well, drugs.  For me, at any point in my life, a significant weight loss can be a big deal.

After my teen years, I went deep down into how I felt about and treated my body.  I did A LOT of inner work to change how I felt about my curves. I did have a miraculous transformation, but I didn’t lose a single pound.  What changed was my belief about beauty, bodies, being a woman, everything.  One of the results of this work was becoming a burlesque performer.  As a woman with a curvaceous, voluptuous body, burlesque taught me that it is not the flat stomach or the perky boobs that make a woman.  It is her smile, her light, and how much she loves herself that will determine how the audience, and the world, feels about her. This was a huge lesson for me that spilled over into every area of my life.  

As I was performing and teaching my burlesque/seduction classes,  my weight vacillated between 165 and 175.  I was fine with that, and my students loved it.  They loved my body.  They loved to watch me dance and perform and seduce.  I didn’t have the “perfect” body, but I sure as hell didn’t care, and that opened up the possibility for them to not care either.  Many women told me how watching me perform profoundly changed how they felt about their own bodies.  Once, after performing at a dear friend’s engagement party, an icon from the fashion world came up to me and said “Kitty, your body makes me want to gain weight”. Wow, I thought.  My body is powerful.

So, after making some changes in my self care over the last few months, imagine my surprise when I hopped on the scale at the doctor’s office and the nurse reported in a blase tone “151”.  
What?  Check again. That’s not possible. How could I have lost 25 pounds? I knew my clothes felt smaller, but Jesus! For a girl who used to weigh herself before and after a poop just for the satisfaction of seeing the ounces go down, this was going to take some adjusting.

The most shocking thing is, after a lifetime of weight loss being a holy grail, my first reaction was to hearing that number was “Oh NO!” Who am I without my total voluptuousness?  My body is my edge.  I mean, who is going to trust a girl that promotes body adoration if she herself doesn’t have a belly paunch? And what about my acts? I will no longer be making a political statement with my body, I’ll look like I’m just doing it to look pretty! And what about when I meet people and tell them what I do? With fat on my body I felt protected.  Like, “yes I teach seduction and striptease to empower women, you got a problem with that?” Without that protection I felt like I would be judged as slutty, vapid, without substance.  Just another skinny girl trying to make women conform to what the culture says their body should look like.

Then I heard a voice (inside my head): “Hey cutie! Knock, Knock! Who’s thinking these things? Them, or YOU?” It’s kind of funny and really humbling when you realize that after dedicating your life to women loving their bodies, you actually judge the living hell out of women with bodies that look more like the culture’s feminine ideal.

So this is my next life lesson.  Learning to love my body at any weight.  Even a lower one.  Of course I enjoy feeling more comfortable in my clothes, feeling lighter and stronger and more connected to my body.  But what I am working on right now is that I do not need my body to speak for me.  My body is going to change and evolve with me throughout my whole life. I have a voice.   I have a life I am living.  I have thoughts, dreams and opinions to share. So as I go on being myself, let’s just let her be herself too.

You also have a voice,  thoughts, and  opinions, and I would love to hear them.  Leave me a comment on loving bodies of all sizes, your experiences with changes in weight, or anything you
would like to share with me in the comments below.  

And, if body love, body worship and body adoration is something you could use a leg-up with, join me for Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice, September 14th and 15th.

There Is Such A Thing As The Perfect Body

(An excerpt from the Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice Workbook)

Venus of Willendorf

One of the most undeniable virtues of a true Sacred Seductress is the way she loves her flesh. A Seductress loves every inch of her self: smooth skin, dimpled skin, parts that stick out, parts that just don't. It is all as beautiful as a sunrise to her. And because of the conviction in her self-love, the judgments one usually makes about a female body seem to slip away when they are in her presence. She is that powerful.

A Seductress does not wait around for the "perfect body" to arrive in order to feel and know her full sensual and erotic power. The things she is told she should be ashamed of (fat on her belly, her breast that is smaller than the other, her skin tone, etc.), she flaunts rather than hides like the diamonds that they are: rare, beautiful, and perfectly imperfect.

The way a woman feels about her body is a mirror image to what she believes about herself, her Divinity, and how she relates to the world. Body hatred is an epidemic amongst women. We live in a culture that teaches us to believe that she must meet an impossible list of qualifications in order to feel "beautiful". The tricky thing about this list of benchmarks however, is that there is not a woman alive who could even come close to meeting them all. For every woman who wishes her hips were smaller, there is a woman who wishes her hips were more round. For every woman who wishes her breasts were fuller, there is a woman wishing she could wear t-shirts without feeling self-conscious. It reminds me of the story "The Emperor's New Clothes". We are all striving so desperately to be perfect, sexy, beautiful, young; and yet it is this exact desperation to change what is already perfect that makes us all feel so downright ugly.

A Seductress transcends all of this by making the important distinction between true beauty, and the illusion of "learned beauty". Learned beauty is what we do when our sole purpose is to gain the approval of others. It is living by the message of what we have been taught beautiful means, rather than the beauty that we know is true in our soul. When we aim to achieve the beauty we have learned, we are dependent on external validation to convince us of our power and radiance. But a true Seductress knows with every fiber of her being that her beauty has nothing to do with her lip gloss. Her lip gloss can be a lovely expression of her beauty, but it is certainly not the source of it.

True beauty is eternal. It never leaves us. It does not change with our outfit or our hairstyle or our age. True beauty means that we need never pause in the mirror and ask ourselves "do I look beautiful right now?", because true beauty needs never be questioned. It is a simple feminine truth.

 The Fall session of Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice is happening on September 14th and 15th (Friday evening and Saturday day) Early Sign Up Savings ends Tuesday July 31st. 

I would LOVE to have you in class.

In honor of our true beauty, enjoy the love letter I wrote to my body called Adoration.

 "Adoration" by Gil Elvgren

 Adoration 

 I adore My Body.

It is so scrumptious and delicious, I just want to gobble myself up.
 

 I love my legs. They are like the most elegant champagne flutes. I imagine that if they were a food, they would taste like lady fingers drizzled with chocolate and whipped cream.

I love my arms. I love the way they taper delicately at the wrist. I love their shape as I hold onto the subway rail. I love the way my muscles flex as I sway from side to side.

I love my breasts, they are like the ripest plum, hanging on a vine in Tuscany, warm from the sun.

I adore my hips. Their curves, the way I can grab the flesh on the bone. They give me a sense of home, like a crisp, brown Christmas turkey cooked with butter under the skin. Yum.

I love my Belly. I love the roundness of it. I love how authentically feminine it is. I love having it massaged in a warm bath with oil underwater.
 

I LOVE my shoulders, my clavicle, and my decollete. My clavicle is like an Olympic ice skater. Graceful, elegant. A perfect ten. My decollete; smooth like the frosting on top of a birthday cake. My shoulders, like marble pillars in the Sistine Chapel, holding everything together with strength, grace and beauty.
 

I love my hair. Like warm amber honey. Smooth, lustrous, sensuous.

I love my face. My eyes, like looking down an endless beach. My lips, like perfect velvet pillows you just want to sink into. My skin, like the creamy froth on top of a cappuccino.

I love being a woman.
I love being me.
In the words of Doris Day, "I enjoy being a girl".

 I would love to hear your own love notes to your own body in the comments below. Let's inspire each other into a fine romance with our succulent skin!

   

Just Start (How Qoya arrived at The School of Charm and Cheek)

"Just start" she said.


When Rochelle Schieck spoke these words to me three years ago, I was floating in a swimming pool while she sat on the edge looking down at me with her face full of it's usual mix of passion, love and enthusiasm.  Rochelle is the founder of Qoya, (more about that below) and she had just returned from Costa Rica where she led her very first Qoya retreat. Rochelle is my dear friend and great inspiration. Seeing her achieve this dream made me so proud of her, so inspired by her, and positively green with envy.  I had asked her "Ro, how did you do it?" She replied "just start".


When Rochelle felt the calling to create Qoya, she did the thing I have seen her do best when she needs to make a life change. That thing is travel. She went to California, Brazil, Hawaii, Peru. She said that during this time she prayed, she meditated, she asked for clarity on what this thing was that she felt so compelled to create. She told me "At a certain point I realized, you just have to start. I could see the grand vision of where I wanted to end up, but I didn't know how to start there, so I just started where I was. Just start."

Dancing Qoya in Costa Rica

At the time I was teaching one burlesque class. I don't even think I had a website. This conversation changed everything for me. It gave me the perspective that what I have to offer may not be as good as what I'll be offering 5 years from now, but how will I get to 5 years from now unless I start now? I took her advice. I started, and over the last three years I have created The School of Charm and Cheek, and seen so many of my dreams realized. 

One of these dreams has been to offer a movement/exercise class that addresses a woman's need for pleasure, fun, sensuality, spirituality and community first and foremost. (As it should always be with everything, in my opinion.) The exercise benefits are just the icing on the cake. I am incredibly proud to say that my dream has been realized, as I myself have just returned from Costa Rica as an officially trained Qoya teacher.


To say Qoya is a movement class is like saying the ocean is made up of a few raindrops. True, but not the whole story. Qoya is a spiritual temple, a shamanic journey and the dance party you have always dreamed of.  It is communing with the very throb and heartbeat of life through your very own skin and bones. You know the feeling you get when you see a gorgeous garnet sunset? Or hear a baby's giggle? Or see a three-legged dog wagging it's tail? Or witness a rainstorm in the jungle?  These are the moments when we remember.  We remember that life is magic and mysterious and we feel humbled to be a part of it. Qoya is a form of exercise, but at it's essence, Qoya is a way of accessing this sacred remembrance any time we want it. Through movement we remember that we are all wise, wild and free.


My whole life I tried to exercise like a good girl. I did aerobics, took runs in the park, yoga, endured torturous, sleep deprived mornings at the gym where I would run full-pelt towards myself in a mirrored wall in front of the treadmill.  But the truth was, all I really wanted to do was run as far away from myself as I possibly could. Exercise, to me, was little more than atonement. A way of trying to right the wrongs of this feminine body that was always too fat, too pale, just...not right. Most of what I wanted to change about my body were things that exercise itself could never change.  And yet, it always seemed like the perfection that I so longed for lay just beyond the next horizon. Or in this case, the next set of Pilates tapes I could order off of a TV infomercial.


When I started dancing Qoya with Rochelle, it took alot of re-wiring to understand what she meant when she would say "if it feels good, you're doing it right".  After all, my whole life I thought that doing exercise right meant you needed to feel pain.  "Feel the burn, no pain - no gain, it might not be very fun now, but think of how you'll feel after!"  Jeez. It's no wonder I still feel PTSD at the sight of a set of free-weights.


In Qoya, we draw from the wisdom of yoga, the sweet, wild abandon of dance, and the freedom of sensual movement. Class always begins with a slow, soothing warm up. The message "if it feels good you are doing it right" is repeated over and over. There is no competition, no way of doing this wrong. Class then transitions into a sensual, hypnotic way of doing yoga that feels like a moving prayer. This is followed by dancing, both choreographed and free dance. But this is not just any dancing. When you dance Qoya you dance your whole life. You dance your deepest truth. It is impossible to explain in words. It is like trying to explain swimming in the ocean - something you can't really understand until you experience it yourself.


All of this is done to a soundtrack that takes you from India to the Lower East Side, up to the heights of Heaven and back down to the dance floor of Soul Train. The music is a collection of everything, because Qoya is a collection of everything. It is an hour where there is no such thing as the right way, except the way of your own body and soul.

My First Qoya Class!

Beginning July 10th I will be teaching Qoya classes Tuesday nights from 7-8pm at The Yoga Collective.  As my gift to you, to introduce you to this beautiful new baby girl, for the month of July these classes being are offered by donation.  Pay what you can.  Or pay nothing.  I just want you to get in, get a taste and roll around in Qoya. If you've never done Qoya before or you are a crowned Qoya Queen, whether you hate exercise or you love it, if you just want a way to sweat and stretch that is fun and leaves you feeling happy, I invite you to come dance with me this Summer.  Let's get wise. Let's get wild.  Let's be free!

Scheherazade

Scheherazade.

Say it with me.

Just saying the name invokes seduction.

You may have heard her name before. But do you know her story? 

Once there was a Sultan, who after being betrayed by his wife, had taken to marrying a new virgin bride every day. The morning after his wedding he would order the new bride beheaded out of anger at the transgressions of his first wife. He was convinced his bride’s early death was the only way to keep a woman faithful. Until he encountered Scheherazade.

Scheherazade was the daughter of a political advisor who spent most of her time reading hundreds of books.  She ravenously consumed information on everything from poetry to philosophy, science, art, history, war...anything she could get her hands on.  After passionately pursing her own education she became a magnificent storyteller with a wit as sly as a fox.

Against her father's wishes, Scheherazade volunteered to spend one night with the King. (excuse me - VOLUNTEERED!) Once in the King's chambers, she asked if she might bid farewell to her sister.  When her sister entered the room, Scheherazade began to tell her one last bedtime story. The King lay awake and listened with awe. As dawn broke, Scheherazade stopped in the middle of the story. The King asked her to finish, but since the day had already arrived, there was not time. The King decided to spare her life for one more day to finish the story the next night. So the next night, Scheherazade finished the story, and then began a second, even more exciting tale which she again stopped halfway through, at dawn. So the King again spared her life for one day to finish the second story. And so Scheherazade kept herself alive day by day, leaving the King eagerly anticipating the finishing of last night's story.

At the end of one thousand and one nights, Scheherazade told the King that she had no more tales to tell him. But of course, the King had already fallen in love with her, and over time she had borne him three sons. Having been made a wiser and kinder man by Scheherazade and her tales, he spared her life, and made her his Queen.

Ahhhhh. I could spend a whole week taking this tale apart like an old pocket watch, holding each individual piece up to the light to marvel at it's genius. One of the things I love the most is that in no text I have ever read about Scheherazade does it make a single reference to her beauty.  Often when we think of seduction, the first place our minds tend to go as women is to what we look like.  We are presented with images in our culture of bikini models and sex symbols as being the epitome of the seductress. And yet, how many of us have ever met a woman who is stunning according to the standards of society, yet can barely carry on a conversation? I remember going out on dates when I was 21, having just moved to NYC, spending HOURS preparing myself, blowing hundreds of dollars on my mani/pedi/blowout/waxing/whatever. I'd arrive at the bar, perfectly coiffed but quiet as a mouse, praying that somehow my $25 lip gloss might be able to carry me through.  

After studying the true nature of seduction, I've discovered that physical beauty matters about 2%.  Maybe a little less.  Seduction starts within. Your confidence, your glow, your ability to create fun and outrageous joy no matter the circumstance; these are the bones of living life as a Sacred Seductress.  Don't get me wrong, I still fluff before going out.  But I now understand that the element of physical beauty is kind of like the cherry and whipped cream on a sundae - absolutely essential to it's completion, and yet a topping just the same. 

Scheherazade is just one of the legends we study in Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice, happening July 13th and 14th.  There is a whole section of the class dedicated to her and her genius.  I would tell you the rest of the legends we will be exploring, but alas, dawn is breaking and I must go now. :)

Hoping to see you in July. 

A Story of Birth and Seduction

On this rainy afternoon, I find myself sitting down to write a blog because it’s time to write a blog.  Time to produce.  Time to pump one out.  But truthfully, I am post-partum people!  I have just given birth to a beautiful, gorgeous, powerhouse of a class - Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice.  And it is time to hold her in my arms, smell her little head, and tell her birth story.  

Until about six months ago, the topic of seduction used to simultaneously scare me to death and intrigue me beyond words. I always associated seduction with manipulation, never revealing one's true self, never being vulnerable, and using sex as a commodity. But then, simultaneously, when I would read a story about a seductress, I would burn with envy and desire. When I looked at my icons, all of them seemed to be masters of seduction.  So, because I like a little buck in my bronco, I decided to take this topic on, plunge in head first, and make it a Pleasure Project.

A Pleasure Project is what I do when something scares me, or mystifies me, or just confuses me, and I take it on as research - like an anthropologist. Whenever I feel called to take on a new pleasure project, it is not because I'm bored or need something to do. It is because something in me is calling, tugging at me, desiring to be explored and expressed. Take, for example, G-spot orgasms.  This may be an over-share, (sorry parents and husband) but this topic is something that has been on my radar forever, and I've always wanted to learn more. But simultaneously I feel exhausted at the prospect of exploring such a diverse and confronting topic. So last night I when I went to buy my favorite skin care products and the store was closed, and I found myself right next door to Babeland (a female friendly sex shop here in NY) I knew it was time.  So, with the help of a sweet and knowledgeable female associate, I courageously blew $400 on all things G.  Wish me luck. We'll see if that research makes it into the blog.

In The Tepidarium, Sir Lawrence Alma Tadema

So when the word seduction kept flying around my consciousness like a mosquito I couldn't swat, I started by ordering countless books on Amazon. Some of these books were amazing, some were downright repulsive, but all were educative. I started noticing themes of seduction and opportunities for seduction showing up everywhere.  I would ask myself, "What would be the most seductive move in this situation?" And I started having ALOT of fun.

One of my most interesting findings is that we always associate seduction with sex, when in fact, true seduction is the opposite of sex. Sex is when desire is met. Seduction is not about the culmination or gratification of desire, it is about the thrill of the desire itself. It is the game that is played as the desire comes closer, and closer, and closer, and being able to maintain that tension of wanting for a long, long time. 

As I started practicing seduction not just in my love life but everywhere in my life, I noticed a few things.  Number one, I had more energy. Why? I no longer felt the need to people please.  Do you want to know one of the most seductive things in the entire world? The ability to say NO. I realized that in my effort to make people like me, I said yes way too much.  We’ve all heard that setting boundaries and saying no to things is necessary, but no one had ever framed it as being sexy. Well that was all I needed.  I started experimenting with saying no to people, offers, requests for help, etc.  Sometimes I actually wanted to do these things, but I would force myself to say no just to experiment with that delicious tension, and become more comfortable with it.  Of course, this can be every woman's greatest fear, saying no.  What if I offend someone? What if they won't like me? But you know what happened? People started liking me MORE. My time and my attention became way more valuable to myself and to others.  And the unnecessary things in my life began to fall away, leaving way more time and attention for the things I really, really, really wanted to do.  

The Fountain, Peter Fendi

What I also I noticed is that I became way more satisfied with where I am at in the timeline of my life.  Previously I would worry that I was not moving fast enough, or that because some of the things I want in my life have not yet arrived, it meant I was doing things wrong.  But when examined through the lens of seduction, I realized that if something is not in my life, it simply means that it has not yet fully seduced me, or I it.  This is where the spiritual practice comes in.  This dance of seduction is not just something to be done with other people, but with everything we want in life. Where a no can be equally as satisfying as a yes. A yes is great, but a no just means there is more fun to be had.  Knowing this can really help a girl relax.  

I have so much more to say on this topic, of course, I must now leave you wanting.  I am so proud of this new baby. It is truly the finest class I have ever taught. I am so grateful to every woman who came to the class and is willing to join me as we resurrect the holy, beautiful, sacred archetype of the Seductress. 

PS – My next Seduction Is A Spiritual Practice is happening July 13^th and 14^th.  I would love to have you join me.